Couda, shouda, Woulda

Couda Shouda Woulda: Why not put off until tomorrow what I can put off even longer:

This story is for all those people that complain about what they should have done but did not!



I often listen to people in my family and some of my friends complain about getting their bills paid, shopping done, or cleaning their houses.  They even complain about the enormous amount of homework their kids get and how they are so cramped for time and have so much to do that they don’t know how they will or can fit it all in.  None of these people work.  All of their children go to school full time during the day leaving this overworked person to go and do some personal clothing shopping, get manicure and pedicure and of course a facial.  There is nothing wrong with this but don’t complain when your food budget is depleted and your mortgage payment is late because you used those funds to buy the new Guess Jeans or Fendi bag that you had to have and needed.  Don’t these people work but their spouses not only provide the funds for their bills to be paid and do not ever really become aware of their financial problems until foreclosure comes on the scene.


There is nothing wrong with doing things for yourself or buying something to make you feel better or even that weekly manicure.  However, I coudda paid that bill but I thought it was due in 2 weeks not last week and so what if I am late.  I shoudda paid the mortgage but Nordstrom’s and Sachs were having sales on coats and their new line of bags, how could I resist.  My daughter needed new Uggs and my son had to have a new bike.  I cannot let them not have what the other kids do.  How can I hold my face up in my complex if my children do not have what every other child has?  So sad, but true.


People that put off doing the important things like paying bills, going to the doctor to make sure you are healthy, dealing with their kids homework first and making sure that all tests are studied for and projects are properly done, are living in a world of using one plastic card to bail them out of another one and ignoring what is really important: their kids and their life.


No child needs to have every name brand anything.  No child needs to have every toy in the world or every video game or a high-end computer.  I grew up in the South Bronx and I was taught from an early age that school was my job and only job and my payment was good grades that I got for studying and wanting to succeed.  My parents were not rich but I never thought that I was deprived nor did I ever expect them to buy me something because I had to have it some kids expect.  I never heard my mom or dad say I shudda done that or cudda done this differently or I shudda paid the rent on time instead of using the money to buy a new leather jacket.  If something had to be done, it was done and the rest came later.  My mom insisted that I get A’s on all of my tests and of course, that put a lot of pressure on me.  I wanted good grades and got the A’s but I would never say to my parents I gonna study for the test later or shudda studied harder-I knew that if the teacher said there was a test in one week to get started the day I found out.  I hear kids today and parents tell their children that homework given on the weekend can wait until Sunday night.  They can go and have fun and sometimes these kids actually do their work or they are too tired and ask their parents to write a note to excuse them.  Fridays meant do your homework when you get home from school and you have the rest of the weekend to have fun with your friends and family.  This worked for me and for my sister.  My niece, Jamie is a clone of my mom and I think that is why her two daughters are a students.  Dani Nic studies and gets A’s and no one has to tell her to get started-she just does it because she loves doing well in school.  Guess what!  She is not even paid for getting good grades like those that other kids do.  Kati Rose her little sister is doing well in first grade and is proud of herself for her accomplishments.  I never was paid for getting A’s or I would be very rich today.


Cudda Shudda Wudda done it differently- if you think before you do you might not have to say cudda, shudda wudda?  Do not complain about being behind in your bills if you forget to pay them.  Do not complain about your children if they do not do their homework if you are not on top of it and know what they are supposed to do.  Do not complain that you are too busy to help them study for a test because you need to go shopping with your friends or out with the girls and you are leaving them with teenage babysitter.


Do not put off longer what you have already put off long enough.



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